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Playing for Pride  Payback

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It’s not the season ender we expected back in August.  The New Orleans Saints are playing for 8-8 and scrambling to stay in the playoff hunt.   The Chicks would have been drinking through the season no matter what but some of  the disturbing disappointments in ’07 forced us to imbibe more than we normally would have and mix things we definitely shouldn’t have.

Still our boys didn’t give up after starting with four straight losses and they’ve kept the season interesting through all sixteen games.  So we march back into Soldier Field on Sunday seeking to avenge our loss there last January while hoping for losses by the Vikings and the Redskins to put us into postseason play.  The Chicks will toast the Saints on Sunday win or lose!  Continue reading

Chick Sips: Bearly Alive Bubbly with a Shot of Sweet Revenge and Ass Whipping Cream

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Let’s face it kiddos, it’ ain’t looking good for our boys in black and gold.  The Saints are 7-8 and relying on the Redskins to lose to a 2nd string Cowboys team and the Vikings to lose to a struggling Broncos team to keep their playoff hopes alive.  In other words, Week 17 will be one of those “playing for pride” games. 

The odds are we’ll start the New Year plotting our off-season moves instead of preparing for a playoff  game.  Still, we’ll have reason enough to toast our champagne with the best of them.  We’ll have just kicked some Bear butt on their home turf.  It’s payback for all those nasty signs they held up during last year’s NFC Championship game. And what better way to enjoy a payback, playing for pride ass-whipping than with a classic and classy concoction of happy juice: The Bearly Alive Bubbly with a Shot of Sweet Revenge & Ass Whipping Cream. Continue reading

The NFL Week 16 Power Rankings: Brought to you by Ralphie

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It’s Christmas, which means it’s okay not to post because no one’s online anyways… unless of course they’re alone or their family doesn’t love them, in which case, aw…you poor, sweet baby.  But since we’ve been watching a marathon of a Christmas Story and going shot for shot on every “You’ll shoot your eye out” reference…I find myself suddenly motivated to stick to my weekly routine.  Besides, “shooting my eye out” sounded like the perfect remedy for last Sunday’s Saints game. 
Continue reading

Our Shot Glass is Half Full

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Oh don’t get us wrong, Sunday sucked.  Sunday sucked like an heiress on prom night.  It sucked like every “Police Academy” movie.  It sucked like that flamboyant elf named Lamar sucks candy canes.  If Sunday were a water gun, it’d be called the “Super Sucker.”   Instead of our tasty bird buffet of Falcon, Cardinal, and Eagle, we got dished out a day old plate of “Tur-suck-en” and a side dish of bird flu.  (We’ll get to the silver lining of all this in a moment, but first here’s a heaping scoop of all things suckular.) Continue reading

Her Shirt Says it All

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The Saints are in the final course of a late season bird buffet.  First Course: Falcon Fricassée, yummy!  Second Course: Cajun Fried Cardinal, delightful!  Third Course: Eagle Étouffée with a side dish of Drama Au Gratin.  (Uh oh, somebody better grab us a bottle of Tums!)  Continue reading

Chicks Sips: Apple Green with Envy Martini and an Ice Cold Bird Shooter

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There’s a chick in enemy territory this weekend.  Deep in the heart of Filthadelphia, where the rats roam free and the furry goatees turn decent looking men into human billy goats, Nola Chick will hold her own as one the only fans in the sports bar rooting for the other team.   Oh yeah, I’m gonna be that chick. 

Loud and proud of my black and gold, sporting a Colston jersey (or perhaps the black and gold Saints vest) but definitely a Saints wooly cap and fleur de lis necklace, I will brace myself for the barrage of not-so-clever insults, dirty looks, and the inevitable (because they’ve got no other card to pull) Katrina jokes.  But not to worry, I’ll take comfort in knowing my team still has a shot at the playoffs and their team is D.O.A.  I’ll have the memory of Deuce McAllister ending the careers of their “legendary” defensive ends.  Not to mention that while my QB may underperform under pressure, he would never disgrace us by spewing his chunky soup all over the sideline. And best of all, this Sunday I’ll have the antidote for even the most potent Eagles fan concocted haterade: The Apple Green with Envy Martini and an Ice Cold Bird Shooter.  Continue reading

Aw Hell to the No!!!

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The 2008 Pro Bowl Roster is set and guess who ain’t on the list?  Here’s a hint,  they wear black and gold, they cause frequent bouts of anxiety, and are responsible for my future stint in rehab.  (If you’re still confused, you should probably just stop reading now.)

Sadly, not nary a Saint is going to Hawaii.  Can’t say I really expected any of them to, with the exception of my future baby daddy, the man who catches passes like he caught my heart, Daddy Long Legs himself: Marques “Go-Go-Gadget Arms” Colston. Wanna know who’s going instead at wide reciever for the NFC? Terrell Owens, Larry Fitzgerald, Torry Holt, & Donald Driver. To that I say: “Aw Hell to the No!”

Continue reading