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Dear Dawgs: Geaux F*CK yourselves!

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It was bound to happen: the endless “we was robbed” chants from all the top 5 teams who, unlike LSU and Ohio State, find themselves playing in a BCS game other than the National Championship game.    

Virginia Tech: “We only lost two games in regular season, and it was to two top rated teams.  Why can’t we go?”

Answer: Um, because LSU was one of the teams that kicked your ass. 

Kansas Fans: “Sure we only beat the equivalent of an old folks home ranking wise in regular season, but we were ranked #5.  Doesn’t that mean something?”

Answer: Be lucky you got into ANY bowl game. 

Georgia Fans (Our very favorites): “We’re one of the hottest teams in the country.  We won our last six.  We were ranked at #4.  We didn’t lose over the weekend, so why should our ranking drop. It’s not fair. Waaah! Waaah! Waaah!!”

Answer: Want a little fermented cheese with that whine?  The only reason you didn’t lose a game this weekend was because you didn’t earn the opportunity to play in one because you didn’t win the East in the SEC.  The team that won beat you handily in regular season and guess what, LSU beat that team!! Plus, your other loss was to sorry South Carolina, and they handed it to you!  Losers!!!!  Continue reading

WHAT THE F*CK!!!!!

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The BCS sucks.  I still agree with that.  But here’s what’s changed.  LSU has a legitimate shot at the National Title game.  I know, I know, it sounds crazy.  But WVU and Missouri loss tonight.  Georgia didn’t make it to a conference game, nor did Kansas.  And we beat VT tech handily earlier in the season.  All that means we should face off with Ohio State (or whoever) for the title.  It’s fabulous.  I’m too drunk to put it into words.  Let’s let the Violent Femmes sum it up for me por favor.

The Miles High Club, Part Deux

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What could make the pill of crushed National Title dreams easier to swallow for an LSU fan?  How bout the news that Les Miles plans to hang around the Red Stick a little while longer.  Then, there’s the icing on the cake…an SEC Championship victory in a dogfight against the Vols.  Nothing says sweet like seeing our Purple and Gold in the Sugar Bowl. 

LSU 21 Vols 14

Oh, and did you see Les rip the media a new one at his news conference earlier today?  We gotta say, seeing him get all riled up makes us randy baby!

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The Miles High Club

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The body’s not even cold and yet Michigan has already stepped up its game to court LSU head coach Les Miles.  A report on NOLA.com confirms that LSU’s athletic director gave Michigan the ok to interview Les after Saturday’s SEC Championship game.  (Why waste time…maybe they should conduct the interview on the sidelines at halftime.) 

In Les’ defense, at least he hasn’t denied an interest in the Michigan job, unlike Little Nicky Saban.  So will he go or will he stay?  Well, he’s from Michigan and taking the job would make him one of the highest paid coaches in the country.  With that said, anybody wanna join me in pouring out a little liquor to say goodbye? 

First Saban, now Les.  Why does this keep happening to LSU?  Maybe it’s because the school’s athletic director isn’t putting enough energy into finding homegrown (see: loyal) coaching talents.  As for the future of the Tigers, the team will lose 25 seniors after this season.  That means we Tiger fans have 26 reasons to drink heavily starting Saturday.

Why the BCS Can Suck It!

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Here’s the old news: the BCS is an unreliable, unpredictable, and plain old un-smart (yeah, I know that’s not a word) way to determine the best team in NCAA football.

Here’s the new news: the BCS can suck it!

BCS (which stands for Bogus Crap Shoot) is a system based on statistical figures and polls used to determine college football rankings.  It ultimately decides who will play in which BCS bowl game, which team gets ranked where, and who goes head to head in the National Championship game.  The system has been in place since 1998.  That’s also about the time when fans of one team or another started realizing they were getting “Al Gored” out of a title that was rightfully theirs. Continue reading

Quack is Whack!

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The curse of the #2 continues as the Oregon Ducks fall prey to those wiley Wildcats.  As for #3 Kansas, be careful what you wish for…

AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

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Tigers 41 Tide 34

How does it feel “Little Nicky?”