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When Reggie Met Mario…

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The Saints are headed to Houston on Sunday to personally thank the Texans for Reggie Bush and take a figurative dump on the Lone Star State for that other Bush they loaded off on America. It’s a battle of hungry 4-5 teams, both fighting for their postseason lives. Who will win the match-up? Well, to understand the future, we must first look to the past. (Cue blurry effect and mystifying music…) Continue reading

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WE’RE GOING STREAKING!!!!!

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Not since “Frank the Tank” ran butt nekkid through the streets in Old School has a streak made this chick feel so darn giddy.  The Saints have won 4 in a row people.  They’re  just a half game behind the division leader in the NFC South, with nothing but losing teams to pave their way to the playoffs.  Go ahead and marinate on that for a minute… Continue reading

Introducing: Indy Chick

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As far as Nola Chick’s concerned, the biggest game of the day takes place at Noon in the Superdome when the Jags take on the Saints.  But for some odd reason, the media and millions of sports fans everywhere have their panties in a bunch over a game featuring two undefeated teams with stellar offenses.  It’s the classic battle of good versus evil: the Pats versus the Colts. 

Among the throngs anxiously counting down to what’s been not so cleverly dubbed “Super Bowl 41 1/2” is a little someone we call “Indy Chick.”  She’s got a lot on her mind today and she turned to us to let it all out.    Indy Chick, the floor is yours…. Continue reading

River City Rematch

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While the Chicks never wish harm upon players from other teams (well, almost never John Carney), we do admit to secretly doing a happy dance upon learning Jacksonville Jaguars QB David Garrard wouldn’t be suiting up on Sunday.  Before his high ankle sprain, Garrard led Jacksonville to a 4-2 record thanks to his speedy mobility paired with a laser rocket arm.  But against the Saints, he’ll be about as helpful as the lovely ladies on the sidelines holding pom-poms.  Continue reading

John Tucker Carney Must Die

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Picture it: Atlanta, December 21, 2003.  A lovely, prim and proper young lassie from the mean streets of New Orleans finds herself miles away from her homeland and thereby forced to watch her Saints from a sports bar.  In those days, the common woman couldn’t afford the luxury of NFL Sunday Ticket and even if she could, her bitchy apartment complex managers wouldn’t let her put up a damn dish without putting down a security deposit like the money grubbing leeches they are…but we digress.

It was during that time that the Saints found themselves at 7-7 and on the cusp of a playoff berth, despite playing like a heap of smoldering crap for most of the season.  All they needed to do was beat the Jaguars to get one step closer to 9-7 (which equals greatness in the NFC) and they’d potentially march right into the playoffs.  Then came that sunny day in Jacksonville and what would come to be known as the River City Relay…  

   

The resulting temper tantrum from John Carney’s missed PAT attempt cost me a brand new, short-heeled, black leather Mary Jane shoe and an undisclosed amount of dignity in front of a frightened crowd of sports bar patrons.  As fate would have it, the man who was the source of so much pain, is now wearing a Jaguars jersey.  We know you got cut from the Saints, but Jacksonville?  Et tu, Carney? 

While my broken shoes have gone out of style, the pain is still very much in season.  Consider Sunday a day of redemption.  And remember Carney, revenge is a dish best served black and gold.

SCARY THOUGHTS FOR HALLOWEEN…

Patriots really could go 16-0…

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Tom is Gisele’s Bitch….

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Chad Makes Sense

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Soulja Boy Dance Ain’t Just for Devin Hester Anymore 

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Week 8 Power Rankings: Brought to you by the Serial Streaker…

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The NFL Week 8 Power Rankings are out and we couldn’t be more bored by the top 10. The only thing that really matters is that the Saints have moved up from 26 to 19! Yay!

What, you want more? Oh fine. Here’s your damn top 10.

1.) Patriots- Unstoppable…blah blah blah…running up score…blah, blah blah…classless…blah blah blah…16-0…blah blah blah

2.) Colts- Here are your orders: DESTROY THEM!

3.) Cowboys-Romo BEFORE $67 million contract= Tool

Romo AFTER $67 million contract= “How you doin’….”

4.) Packers- Since the ESPN crew did all but ask Brett Favre to have their babies during Monday night’s game, what’s left for us to say?

5.) Giants- Way to go across the pond and teach those Brits what we knew all along: You’re one bloody boring team!

6.) Steelers- Beating up on the Bungles: that don’t impress me much!

7.) Chargers- See, Patriots. There is a way to crush your opponent without looking like total schmucks.

8.) Jaguars-Thank you for beating the Bucs. Now, consider yourselves our sworn enemy.

9.) Titans- Oh c’mon. Are you guys trying to win ugly?

10.) Lions- An NFC team we can actually be happy for, and only because we feel your pain.